i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
