that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
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