Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
