Whod you bang
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
