worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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