People in love make me want to vomit
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize