At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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