their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
