so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
