my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize