Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
