I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
