Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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