If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
