Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
