I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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