new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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