I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Dignity is for republicans.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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