Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
