sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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