Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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