Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.

(407): View more from Florida

I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.

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(860): You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you. (407): I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige. http://tfl.nu/6i4m

Replies (1) Good night (1562) Bad night (541)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.

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(336): I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/wwtn

Replies (2) Good night (868) Bad night (1411)
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(989): View more from Michigan

if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK

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(989): if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK http://tfl.nu/niip

Replies (2) Good night (806) Bad night (887)
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(212): View more from New York

I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.

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(212): I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home. http://tfl.nu/lyh0

Replies (7) Good night (2510) Bad night (720)
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(443): View more from Maryland

Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.

(1-443): View more from Maryland

Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.

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(443): Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain. (1-443): Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one. http://tfl.nu/00ky

Replies (38) Good night (3983) Bad night (1624)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.

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(704): He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza. http://tfl.nu/a4a2

Replies (8) Good night (1130) Bad night (2928)
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(716): View more from New York

So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.

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(716): So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat. http://tfl.nu/aisk

Replies (5) Good night (3217) Bad night (1027)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.

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(859): You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower. http://tfl.nu/ss7c

Replies (5) Good night (2256) Bad night (750)
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(714): View more from California

IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX

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(714): IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX http://tfl.nu/wmyf

Replies (12) Good night (2403) Bad night (1304)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.

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(920): Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience. http://tfl.nu/3t0z

Replies (0) Good night (1246) Bad night (547)
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(631): View more from New York

He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.

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(631): He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims. http://tfl.nu/mqeu

Replies (16) Good night (2647) Bad night (917)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.

(1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..

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(306): I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights. (1-306): I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year.. http://tfl.nu/9s2f

Replies (2) Good night (1213) Bad night (347)
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(712): View more from Iowa

Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.

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(712): Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably. http://tfl.nu/fl3q

Replies (0) Good night (519) Bad night (277)
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(516): View more from New York

like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked

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(516): like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked http://tfl.nu/u8p9

Replies (2) Good night (735) Bad night (279)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital

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(617): And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital http://tfl.nu/4ljf

Replies (0) Good night (245) Bad night (420)

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