i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize
