i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
