Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
