I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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