I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
