call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
A Guy Sent A Woman What May Be The Craziest Breakup Text Ever
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
28 Completely Safe For Work Pictures Of Genitals
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go