If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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