I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
two words: eviction party
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
