She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
you had me at cake vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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