$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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