4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
