Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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