So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
