it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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