Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
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He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just high enough for therapy.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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