My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
