Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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