Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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