man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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