So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I believe in your delicious
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?