I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
