i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
