She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
