She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
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Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
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Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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