so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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