what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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