4 words: hood of his car
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
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