Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
